My wife and child are out of town at the moment which leaves me with the opportunity to get into all sorts of mischief. For example, my family likes cheese pizza pretty much exclusively. I like to live on the edge and load a pizza down with all kinds nonsense. So they go out of town and I decide that now is the time to live like a vagabond king. I steal away to the Publix and secure myself a supreme pizza from the Red Baron himself. I come home, cook that badboy up, and ate half of it. That is when I figured out that I am, in fact, getting old as a dusty mummy’s buttcheeks. I got horrible heartburn and spent a whole night regretting my devil may care attitude. I need my family to come home before I eat an entire box of fudge rounds!

Have a great weekend, you buffalo chicken wings!!